i think my mom watched the whole time
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize
