butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
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I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
Lord give me the strength to not check my tinder messages at my grandmother's wake.
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