Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
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