dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
Apparently karate chopping the fronts off all the paper towel and soap dispensers in the bathrooms isn't even frowned upon. Like even at the third bar when I fell flat on my back trying to jump kick the last one some guy just helped me up and high fived me. America.
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
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