Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
