when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
well you can't waste a boner
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
Randomize
