if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
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