i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Randomize