I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
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