i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
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