He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
one two three fourrrrnication!
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
Randomize
