Quick, to the slutcave!
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
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