Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
Randomize
