I just woke up surrounded in unopened snacks
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
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I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
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The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
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