i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
Randomize
