i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
Randomize
