Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Randomize
