Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
Randomize
