i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
Those nachos came to me in a dream
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
Randomize
