C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
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