I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
highlight of my day: hitchhiking a ride with random locals. tried to make conversation, asked what they do. driver says "you clearly don't recognize me." turns out i have had sex with him and forgot.
You are officially qualified to graduate from college.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
