Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(913): View more from Kansas

So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized

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(231): View more from Michigan

I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.

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(970): View more from Colorado

Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.

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(716): View more from New York

Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.

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(985): View more from Louisiana

Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write

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(209): View more from California

is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.

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(520): View more from Arizona

She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math

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(603): View more from New Hampshire

You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time

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(613): View more from Ontario

The Lion King Is on YouTube

(416): View more from Toronto

Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot

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