I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
Randomize