Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
Randomize
