You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
And you know what the worst part is? Because of him I can now relate to a goddamn Taylor Swift song. FUCK. MY. LIFE.
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
