Can Purell be used as lube?
walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As if I didn't already know that I was in the friend zone, our conversation that included the words "kiddo" and "old friend" really was a knee biter.
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
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