Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
You were ¾ of the way through the first pitcher of margaritas then you turned to me and said "Wow I can barely taste the vodka!" And then…….
...Then...
Then I told you margaritas are made with tequila not vodka. You whipped the pitcher at the wall and ordered another one
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
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