I'm sorry my penis didn't work
it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
I don't think brook has ever known best
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
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