i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
Randomize
