he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
he told me I talked like a deaf person
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
Randomize