apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize