he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize
