dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
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