do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
I just woke up to three voicemails from you. In the first one you just straight laughed for 3 minutes. In the second you did bird calls. In the third you were hysterically crying. Have fun last night?
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
Hey, scratch that. I've shit 8 times today. I don't have the energy to get laid so I cancelled my date.
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
Randomize