That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
i spent an hour trying to convince my psychiatrist that the fact that i showed up for my appointment drunk was progress, and she does not agree
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
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