Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
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