you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
Randomize
