Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
