is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
I deserve to be covered in dicks
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
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