if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
Randomize
