FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
