How'd it feel making her break her religion?
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
Tinder date just called. I was supposed to be there 30 minutes ago but I'm on a 27 game win streak in Park...?
Fuck that man! Tell her your dog died or something. Reschedule that shit, you can't stop 2K at a time like that. Ball is life bro... Priorities.
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
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