I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Randomize
