Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
I just ate a drumstick out of the garbage. I need a life coach.
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Randomize
