Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
I think you'll appreciate my way of waking up today: Under my cubicle, boxed in by boxes of printer paper, and hung over. I don't even know how the fuck I got in here in the middle of the night. I went to my car and fell back asleep. I'm now 2 1/2 hours late.
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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