wakey wakey hands off snakey
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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