There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Randomize
