Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
Randomize
