Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
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