so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.