But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize
