you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
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